VOLI'JIi: 57. NEW SERIES. BEDFORD G AZETTE * is ruiti.isiiicc evr.iiv FIUUAY MORNING B11" 11. IN liBVHftN At tb following Terms, to wu : .*'.sc per annum, CASH, IN advance. go no " " it paid within tlie year. •>*<jo it not paid within the year. PV*'\O -übscripnon taken lor less than six months. iS-No paper d.scont.nued until all arrearages are i.aid unless a r the option ol the publisher. ■ • heen' decided by the United Sntes Courts/bat the , stoppage o. a newspaper without toe payment ot ar rearages, is pri.na facie evidence oi tra.id - and is a '^"The°courts have decided that persons are ac countable for the subscription price ot newspapers, 11 th ey take them from the post office,whether 'hey >ubscribe lor them, or not. Fiotnthe Pennsylvania!:. A NEW WlCbi AWAKE SONG. AIR —"MAJOR 10SGB0W."' A rail splitter onward 1 ceme I'nto my inauguration ; And 1 am resolved to keep mum, Until at the head of the nation. Oui troubles 1 plainly can show, Of anxiety ate but a spurt ; Only look how my whiskers do grow, And yet there is nobody hurt About some tilings I'm not up to -null ; In tariffs I have little learning ; But 1 feel I have knowledge enough, A fat salary soon to be earning. Our troubles you surely rr.nst know, Are all in my eye speck of oirt ; Only look how mv whiskers do grow. And yet there is nobody ' hurt! For Seward I care not a fig. Tbur'.ow Weed, nor yet Horace Oreeley ; Winnie Scott is the roan tor my rig, For he can do something, real)". What use about troubles to blow, Of anxiety merely a squirt ; Only look bow my whiskers do grow, And yet there is nobody hurl ! So farewell to my auditors all— Democratic. also Abolition ; lag rag great, and bcbtail so small ; 1 have nothing to say in addition. Our troubles you surely new know Of anxiety are but a flirt ; Only look bow my whiskers do grow, And yet there is nobody hurt 1 SPEECH OF REV. DR. JwHK W. NEVIK", OF LANCASTER, DELIVERED IN THE DEMOCRATIC STATE rns'VK\"Wo. rrti.iv n FEBRUARY THE 21st AND 22<i, TWi. Mr Preiide.nl, and Gentlemen of the Con vention —lt is hardly necessary lor me to say that I atr. no parly man ; no politician, in the ordinary sense of the term. 1 have never be fore addressed a m-eting like the present; and ,• j 1 as-ure you, with no s nail amouoioli.it fi lence and self-distrust that t venture, ... obe dience to your call, to come betore you now in this cuhlic way. In ordinary times, I should not have considered myself at liberty, inde-i., to take part in the proceedings of any such po lii ical body. But, Mr. President, these are n.t ordinary times. We are in the midst ot a crisis which moes bev-ond all ordinary party quest. - .s and issues—a crisis which is radical ami revo lutionary in its nature a crisis , which reach's ti the very foundations of our poituca f.vi ,lir, and which, m this view, challenges the concern, and invokes the act.v. interest of every man n the conntrv, in his personal cbarut t-. citizen and patriot. The time has com- when all who have any mtere>t at -take on inesafHt of the country are bound to apply both nur.d ami heatt to the perilous condition ol the coun try, and to join hand, also, so far as (.ml may have given them any sort of power for the pur p,*e, to the solemn, all necessary lask of saving ft, ,f still possible, from hopeless confusion and '"one of the most discouraging tilings, m fact, connected with our national .s jiis. t ie 'act that it has been found so ditliculf, 1 might i.ay impracticable, thus far, to establish, m this way. any direct communication between hese troubles and the general minds of the people - Men chosen on old party issues to .epresenl the people,and bound themselves by p?rty pU forms made to suit the purposes of other times altogether,and having no fitness whatever for the revolutionary crisis which is upon us now, have insisted on considering themselves the on ly Hue representatives of the people still Ml These changed circumslances-and to make the matter worse, have insisted also on making their old platforms the necessary rule and measure of this representation. Could we well conceive ol anv greater iabsurdity ? Ihe very idea o pretending to deai with the lile and leatn ques tion through which the nation is now passing, by the mechanica! formulas and stereotyped shibboleths of a platform which was got up tor political purposes in a time of comparativt qui efness and peace, deserve to be set down as the most arrant political quackery. As lit I- _as one might hope to stay the cou.se ot a deadly fever by administering pills prepared for au or dinary ht of indigestion, so Utile may it be im agined that the life of .he nation is to be saved now by any similar doses of past party doctrine and rule. For my own part, I can have no pa tience with any platform of the past year ap plied to our nresent circumstances in any such mechanical wav. Away with all such Pro crustes' beds, employed to tyrannize in such a time as this over the free minds of tree mer..— No true public man, f am bold to say, no poli tician worthy of the name, no statesman of broad and comprehensive views, can be willing at the present time to .stand patty-bound, the slave of Jead formulas and abstractions. Waal the country now needs is, above all things, to ' be delivered from all pitcnt nostrums of this sort. A living revolution, to be guided aright : calls for the free, living activity of living men. • If is a great misfortune then, I repeat, that the representatives of the people chosen before these troubles, and governing themselves, as it would seem, f>r the most part, by party views and principles belonging to u different state of things I altogether, should claim, nevertheless, to be the < only true exponents now of the popular mind ; j and will through all these convulsions and dan- j ; gers, and so refuse, week after week, and month ' niter month to make room tor the people to ui ter their feelings in regard to them, in their own name, and with their own proper voice, j Never was there a time in the history of the j country when it was more important that th#' people, m their original private capacity and char.u_t.".-, should have an opportunity, Joot on ly of thinking for themselves or. the affairs ot i the nation, but of expressing also their collec tive thoughts an 1 wishes in a perfectly free manner, uotrammeled by all party technicali ties and watchwords. The national trouble I tt w upon us is organic, constitutional, having I to iio with the very life of the body politic.— It requires for its help, therefore, an organic > movement on the part of (he nati >n itself. Ihe J people must put themselves in motion. i hey , cannot be saved by their rulers least of all, by ■ professional politicians. If saved at all, they j must, under God's blessing, save them-j j selves. In these circumstances, sir, there has been in the hearts of many, tor some tune past, a grow ing desire, an inward cry I may say, for some . fit occasion and opportunity through which to t have the sense—the present sense of the people i taken t n the subject of our national difficulties; as they now stand. With this feeling f have all along sympathised from the bottom of my heart. Especially has it appeared to desira ble and important that the mind of Pennsylva nia should b- known in this way ; not by con- ; suiting her representatives either at .Washing- j ton or Harrisourg, and not by appealing to her last State vote given when no one dreamed ot what has since come to pass ; but by securing, tor the people at large the opportunity of spea- ' kmg directly for themselves, in full view of our public affairs as they show themselves at the present tune. I have waited anxiously for -oine movement looking to this end, which m'ght be without regard to party altogether, haying t >r its object simply an unbiased expres sion oi tie n.ind of the people, so far as they should see fit to give utterance to it in such tree way. ft this hope and wish, however, I t bave found myself, along with thousands and ten thousands ot others, wofnlly disappointed. If has required in the end we all know, a move ment of the Democratic party, in its estaulisbed party organization, t > meet in any way what inis'tim—'... oppor tunity for hearing and knowing directly from the people themselves their mind and i r ,LT with regard to the present crisis. In this view, I could not but hail with satisfaction the calling ol this National Convention ; and, when my fellow citizens saw proper to send me here as one of their delegates, knowing as I did, the special object of the occasion, t and haying u-i sympathy with it in my hrart,! felt ;t to be far me in the present juncture a duty, nut only < I pati i otism, but of religion also, not to refuse the appointment. Such is the spit it in which I n.w find myself a member of your large and respectable body- Forme this is no simple Democratic Convention. lam willing to al io w i, indeed, all due honor a ( r spect, under this time venerable title. But I see in it far more than this. For me it is the organ of the c .iversal conservative spirit ot Pennsylvania, h is the first form absolutely ti which the peo ple of this State have had it in their power to speak lor themselves on the state of the Nation, since the beginning oi our present'tronble?. In this respect it may be said to carry with u now more weight than the existing Legislature of the State, or its representation in the National Congress. For these at best show only what will of a bare majority of the people in former and altogether different times; where as tins body springs directly and immediately from the present will ol the people. It is born we may say, out ot the burdened .heart ol th country, as it now stands. It comes fresh from the iwople, and is animated with the existing soul and breath of the people more than any organization besides. There can be n ques tion, moreover, but that it represents in reality now by far the'l'argest portion of the popula tion of the State. For very many thousands, forgotten all party na nts and distinctions, it is as 1 have just declared it to be for my sell, no Democratic Convention at all, strictly, but a Convention representing the whole conserva tism of Pennsylvania, in which all other ques tions are for the time sunk in one great purpose r>l securing the preservation and peace of ttie country. Looking at it in such light, they are ready to rallv around it with their lieaits, ami to bid it God speed in its of patriotism and love. In view of ail circumstance®, tuen, the pres ent Convention well to be considered of much more than ordinary significance ami moment. L"t it only be true and faithful to itself -lei it be but united and harmonious in its action ; let it show itself wise, judicious, calm, earnest, and firm in its declarations, hoi l ing itself strictly to the one great objc* of its coming together ; and, beyond all question or doubt, its voice will be heard and felt as a voice of authority andf power—healing and refresh in" power—throughout the length and breadth of "the land. It will met with a cordial, e-rateful response from all the mountain tops, and valleys, an I plains of this broad Common wealth, It will be recognized throughout the Nation, a® the true and genuine voice of glori ous old Pennsylvania, the Keystone State. Two grand questions—the second turning on a wrong answer given practically to the first — londlv bpspeak now our solemn attention.— The alternatives set before us in the first are, compromise or separation. In case of separa tion, the alternatives in the next place are, BEDFORD, PA., FRIDAY MORNING, MARCH 8,1861. I peaceful di vision, or coercion and civil war.— rhese questions we are bound to look steadily | in the lace, and to meet with some explicit an- j swer in our own minds. With the progress of| ' events they are rushing every day, ot them selves, to a practical solution. We owe it to j ourselves to consider how the solution in either , ! case ought to coine, and by some rational deter- j ruination of this belorehand, to see that, so tar j 1 at lead as may depend on ourselves, theconclu*j 1 sion shall not overtake us blindly and with help- ! ' less surprise. The first alternative, as just said, is compro- j | mise with the Southern States, or separation.—*! In this simple tor in precisely the issu- is now j before the country. It is perfectly idle to re sist the idea <>t compromise, ami yet dream of. an ukimate continuation of our national exis tence, tu some torin that shail be tbund to in-': volve in the end the submission ol the South i to me wrong which it now supposes itselt to be j suffering at the hands ot the North. Those, who allow themselves to believe that the South may be either cheated or lorced into any such j submission, betiay a wonderful want ol ac- ! ' qtniniance with the actual sense and meaning •ut tfir difficulty which now needs to be compo sed and settled brtween the Northern and Son 1 ; t.'iern sections ot the country. And it is hardly ' i necessary to say, that 'he question h-re regards I not simply tlie States which have aljeadv gone ' into secession, but the slave-holding* States in 1 general. The Border States South, it i: true, have made thus far a noble stand against the j spirit ol disunion ; but we have no right in the j ; world to presume on tins as any assurance that . j thev will remain in the Union under all cir- * cumstaoces, and without regard lurih-r to the > ! Southern idea of Southern rights. Ihe very t | object of their patience and foroearance has be*n j to allow tun-' and opportunity tor the amicable j ! adjustment of their rights in the bosoiri i f the 1 i Union itself. L< j t the North refuse t> meet | them in any sucn spirit of honorable compro- j ! mise, and it is perfectly certain tiiat they will ' also in a short time withdraw, nod jtwn them selves to the new Confederacy of the South. — To separation in this wholesale iorm it must as suredly ccine, if there is to be no compromise. This is the terrible alternative—this, and noth ing less than tins—to which in fact all seek to j duve the nation who set themselves to oppose j the policy of making what are called coil cess - j ions to the dissatisfied spirit of the South. L-t the terms of the dilemma be well considered j and well understood. The watchword, no compromise, means sitnply in other woods, nei ther more nur less, Disunion —two coliledera ! cies instead of one. Ttiose who oppose compromise speak ot it of i ten as though it were intended to mean mer*- ' l rgbi u'i tn"')fie side lo humor some jop weakness on the other side. Tins, however, ! IS Itself a wrong done to the South in the case before us, which most be telt to be wrong, and so etven up, before any real progress whatever can be made in the work ot solid and lasting I reconciliation. Compromise here means no ' more favorable terms of Union than those which ' have existed before between the Northern and Southern portions of the country ; it is merely the re-adjustment ol the old terms,ao explained and guarded as 'o secuie their proper construc tion and right observance in aii following time. The South claims to be in this ditliculty the injured party, ami cfiaiges the North with hav j ing virtually disowned the oiigmai spirit of tot i Constitution. Either the charge is right, or i !j s wroug. If it wrong, there can be no roon ■ properly speaking, for any compromise, am. i jnv negotiation for 'tie purpose, it it set-ui at al j successful, mu.-t end in hypocrisy only, am j falsehood. But if the charge he light, it mutt ' first ol all, befell and owned tofce rigid, B I that case, compromise becomes a settlement an I correction ol wrong, alike honorable to bot sides. This, then, is ttie verv first thing abo 1 which we need to have our minds tuiiy mat] up, in this business ol reconciliation. Has lij Southbeen wronged in its constitutional rights d the part of the North ' Those who deny this make a special commonly ol standing by the Coosti.ution j it is, and charge the liiends ot compromise wn a design to tamper iri some way with its sacC principles. But when you come io examij the matter, it is found that what they mean j the Constitution is simp! v a certain construct! of this organic law established tor the time the authority of a reigning party. I'heir di trine is, that what the will ot a majority ot I nation may determine at any time to be l sense of the Constitution, that must be tak and held for the true sense of it, until it ir happen lobe reversed arid changed by* the v\ of some new majority, agreeing to tbink i different way. So. "for the present, these of the Constitution is made to he the Chic plattorm, as sanctioned and endorsed in appe a nee by the late Presidential election. I this is "itself to violate the fundamental, cond lion of the Constitution. Let this view p vail, and it would be enough ol itself to g yoke secession, not only here,on the part ot; South, hut on the part of Pennsylvania alsoj every other State possessed ola particle ol pij er regard for its own rights; for in that < the Constitution would be not a bond of f dom at all, hut a mere organ of tyranny oppression, at the service of any fanaticism might be able to lay bold of it for 'nis end. What -ve need to consider here is not such party construction ot the Constitution) even the mere letter itselt of the writtei strument, but the spirit, the genius, the q nal soul and life of the Constitution. Thai has been violated in away injurious and H ting to the Southern States, is too plain, it s lo me, to admit of any serious question. 1 thing in the world is certain historically, that°the Constitution was intended to be a
of political union between the Northern Southern States, under which they shou allowed to maintain their separate institi respectively, without let or hindrance, a without any sort ol mutual responsibility. Freedom of Thought and Opinion. no other terms was it possible to unite these several independent Common wealths in a com mon Confederacy. It lay in the very natute of ttie case, that the Constitution in these cir cumstances should know no North and no South, no-slaveholding and no non-slavebolding States —that it should be perfectly neutral and indiff erent to these distinctions, extending over them simply the shield os its common protection.— But the complaint of the South now is, that the original spirit of'the Constitution in this view .s no longer practically regarded on the part of the North, hut that on the contrary a system of thinking has organized itself here, and gradual ly gained the ascendancy, which holds slavery to be simply tolerated by trie Constitution, while it pretends to make it at the same time a party against the fair political equality ol the Southern Slates, and an organ for undermining secietlv the very pillars ot their peculiar social system. Such is their complaint; and we must shut our ey.-s to the truth not to s u e that the complaint is only too well supported by facts'. In the eircurmtances, who will say that we ought not to own the reasonableness and pro priety of the call which i" made upon us to settle,tt,H dithculties which have now beset us in the way of concession and compromise :* or that we should hesitate for a moment to do this on the bass which is proffered to us tor this pur pose, by Virginia and her associate border States ? It should be no objection to such an arrangement, that it calls for some new adjust ment ot the Constitution. That does not im ply any change iri the spirit of the Constitution ; it is merely ihe way in which suitable form and expression is be given to this spirit, in or oer l<> insure its preservation more truly than | I).-tore. This, it seems to me, is th only course of.wis dom i i the case of those first alternatives, com promise or division. Let there be by all means compromise, sincere, lull, and fairly satisfac tory to the States which still adhere to the Union in tile South. But suppose this refused, and the nation unhappily driven to the ex tremity of division, v e are then at once con fronted witii another issue : Shall the sepera tion ho peaceful, with mutual consent and com mon settlement of terms, or shall it proceed through violence and blood, in the way ot ai tempied coercion and consequent civil war ? In the name ol all that is sacred m humanity 3n*Cj|ligio, let us not hesitate about the an with which this most solemn question is met. If we vyill not consent to respect hejfconstitutior.al rights and reasonable de .namjLot our brethren in the South—if we shut necessity ot a general separation ro.ii os a%||he penalty and price of refusing <1 surrender basely what they conceived to Klheir proper, 'i rd'TtTiffk of ToiaiVfJiii ' us still,in spite of the,r purpose arid wish. On this subject it is of the utmost importance that the rnit d of the people generally, and above Oil naw that the mind ot the people of Penn sylvania, should be distinctly determined, and proclaimed abroad as it were on the four winds of '.raven, before the time shall have come for theory to pav S into actual work and deed.— •* e tear it said at times, that we must ina'ntam the attitude of utibendio g authority and pow r, in order to open the way tor peaceful ne gotiation, tint absolute submission to the exis ting government must be insisted upon as a SIN' QUI noii f;l all settlement ol our present difficulties and that to give up openly before hand Hie idea of enforcing such submission, if need be, in the way of outward power, is in tact but to encourage the spirit ot secession and tr. ason. all tins might sound well enough for ordinary circumstances and times. But when will men leain to make lull earnest with the fact, that we are in altogether extraordinary times, in the throes, in truth, ot a gieat politi cal revolution, which must end in the dissolu tion .n r ;n the separation and new birth of our nai ional existence itself, and it can be no better, therefore, ihan political pedantry to think ot going through with it by ordinary maxims and roles. Let us, in the name of common sense, ; be done with speculations and abstractions here and set ourselves to deal with facts in their own character of facts. Let us not be children in this tieinendous dnrr.a of real life, but let us act as reasonatde and full grown men. Does any man in his senses believe, that a resort to iorce, under any circumstances, in thU contro versy with the South, can ever bring back any part of it to its true place again in Union . or that the talk of coercion can ever carry with it the least weight there in favor of reconcilia tion and peace And in the event especially it a general secession embracing all the slave- j holding Slates, ihe event ot which as an immi nent possibility 1 am now speaking, must not every imagination of this sort become still more, [ might almost say, infinitely insine ? Can any threat of coeicion operate with the weight of a feather, to prevent such States ns Virginia, Maryland, Kentucky, Missouri and Tennessee, Iroin throwing themselves into the arms of the new Confederacy, it such a course seem necessary to maintain their rights ? Nay, j if is this very threat, or rather the backward- i ness which is shown to disown it, the studied reserve with which it seems to be held as a sort of rod behind the back, to be used hereafter as occasion may require, instead ot being flung a way at once as it should be—this it ""is, I say, as much almost as anything else just now, which goes to irritate and inflame th- mind oi these States, and U> make it dililcult to bring our negotiations with them to an amicable'and peaceful result. '•The Constitution,"says Andrew Jackson, '•cannot be maintained, nor the Union pre served, in opposition to the public feeling, bv the mere exertion of the coercive powers con fided to the General Government, l'he foun dation must be laid in the affections of the peo ple ;in the security it gives to life, liberty, character, in every quarter of the country ; and in thefiateinal attachment which the citi zens of the Several States bear to one another, as members of one 'political family, mutually contributing to promote the ippmess of one another." These are true and right words.— Let them be deeply pondered, and solemnly laid to heart, by ail who care for the peace of their country at this time. The idea of fighting for the preseivation of j the Union, in its present circumstancces, is, simply preposterous. So victory in such a war' could deserve to be considered a triumph. .No rational object could be gained by it in the end. It could be no better at best than national sui cide iii the most wholesale form. The very thought of it iv something lrom which the soul turns away with unutterable horror and ois gust. But what is needed now is not simply an . abhorrence ot all such war, but an open, loud declaration on the part ot the people that no war ol the sort,with their consent, shall ever be allowed to take place. Jll other words, the : time is aftendy upon us, when to save ourselves; from the vortex of misery into which we aie j in dangerpt being madly dragged in such form, j he voice ot the nation—the overwhelming conservative majority in particular ot this State —should be heard proclaiming in trumpet tones 1 No coercion ! L-t it be faiily known and un derstood, that Pennsylvania has no mind in this j case to be ruled by the dictation of New Eng- ( land or the Northwestern States—that she ismot willing to be made use of as their battle field in any war offensive or defensive against Statts so intimately related to her as those which border on the Potomac that her adhesion to the Chicago Platform it-elf. so far as it went, was in no such sense as to involve any issue so madlv desperate as this ; let it be fairly under stood, I say, that she is ready to protest against all force other than that of love and peisuasion for the settlement of our existing difficulties, and the fact will be felt itself at once as a message of peace and a rainbow of promise throughout the length and breadth of the land. Looking upon this Convention as an organ, 1 created by the special providence ot God for 1 giving such voice to the true heart of the Stale as is needed at the present time, I trust thai it may be enabled wisely and faithfully to dis charge this nigh function and most deeply important office. I consider it a privilege, as I have felt it my duty also, to be here, and to make myself heard in your councils, both as an American citizen and as a minister ot religion. May your work be so done, that it shall com mend itself 10 the judgment and conscience of all good men, and what is of still greater con sequence. be crowned with the appiobation and blessing of the great God in Heaven. 1 qi.UXMIHf COLLOQUY. "And so, "Squire, you dont take a countrv paper ?" "No, Major, I get the city 'papers "on much better terms, so I take a couple of them." "But, 'Squiie, the country papers often prove a great convenience to us. The more we encourage them the better the editor can afford to make them." "Why I don't know of any convenience thev are to me." "The farm you sold last fall was advertised in one of them, and thereby you obtained a customer. Did you not ?" "Very true, Major, but I paid three dollars for it." "And you made more than three hundred i dollars by it. Now, if your neighbors had not maintained the press and kepi it ready for use, | you would have been without the means to 1 advertise the property. But 1 trunk i saw your daughter's marriage in those papers did that cost you anything ?" "No, but—" "And your brother's deaUi with a lorn* obituary not ice. And the destruction of vour neighbor Rigg's house by fire. You know these things aie exaggerated till the authentic accounts of the newspapers set (hern n ffit. "O, true, but And when your cousin, Splash, up for the Legislature, you appeared much gratified 1 at his defense—which cost him nothing." "\es, yes; but these things are news to the readers. They cause the people to taKe the papers." 'No, 'Squire Grudge, not if all were like you. Now, I tell you, the day W. 11 surely come when somebody will write "a long euloev : on your life and character, and the" printer • will put it injtype with all vourfriches, thisjwill j be done for you as a grave is dug for a pauper. ! Your wealth, iiberali'y, and all such things ■ will be spoke,l of ; but the printer's boy, as he spelb the words in arranging the type "to these j sayings, will remark of you-'Poor mean dev il, he is even fponging an obituarv !' Good j morning, 'Squire!" F WPLOYMENT. —A journeyman mechanic in Connecticut, being out of work, and having a family'to support, called upon a gentleman ol the village to see if he could not give him some thing to do. The gentleman asked him what kind ot work he could no besides following his trade. 0 "0, most anything," said the man. The gentleman bethought hirrsell a moment, then asked : "You're a VVide Awake, I believe V' "Yes, sir." Have you got your cape and can yet ?" "Yes, sir." ' "VVell, if you will fput them both on and walk about the streets, with a label attached to the cap, " 1 he last of the Wide Awakes," I'll give you a dollar and a hall per day for the service." "I will," said the man. And at the last accounts he had been work ing at his new trade several days. WHOM: >Olli£R. 2940. A MODEL.—A Iriendof ours is in the habit of visiting a very charming young lady about three times a week—perhaps ofmer. It is not positively known there is an engagement, but the gentleman is so completely domesticated, that he enters the house without knocking, and if his lady love is not in the parlor, does not scruple to go up stairs n search of her. The other day he went through half a dozen rooms without seeing anybody, and at last came to the fair one's own chamber, but found the door locked. "Are you in there, Mary ?" inquired he, with a tender voice. "Bless my heart, Charles, is it you ! go away you scamp, you can't get in !" cried the lady, in great terpidation. "I must, Mary," said the young gpntleman giving the door a shove, which threatened to bieak away all fasteuings. "For Heaven's sake, Charles !" screamed the lady, now in the last stage of terror, "go this instant, I'm— "You're what ?" "I'm a model !" shrieked the lady. •CP"At Haverhill, Mass., twenty-five persons with certain machinery, produce six hundred pairs of Baby shoes daily. Ail the stitching is done by sewing machines run by steam —a com bination of two grfat mechanical inventions.— Every opeiation, except fitting the shoe to the last, even the final polishing and cutting the pegs out of the inside to prevent them from hurting the loot, is performed by machinery. One cl the greatest curiosities is the pegging machine, which inserts the aw!, cuts out the pegs from a strip of wood, and drives them in, all at one operation, and so rapidlv that it will peg t wo ro#s around the sole of a shoe in twen ty seconds. The facilities in this manufactory are such that the raw calf skin and sole "leather can be taken in at the basement of the building and in half an hour turned out in the form of a complete pair of shoes ! ANOTHER OLD SOLDIER GONE. —Mr. John Lodwig, an old soldier of the war of ISI2, savs the Easton Times, was buried with milita ry honors on Monday afternoon e week. His remains were accompanied to their final res ting place by detachments from each of our volunteer companies, the Easton Beneficial So ciety, and the citizens generally. Deceased was a private in Captain Nungesser's company, which marched from this place to Marcus Hook |juring the war of 1812, but was never called into action. .Must have married young. —Jn the Paris Court ot Correctional Police, recently, a lady, 1 * -nffans vming, "advanced coquettishly to the witness stand t0w...- s umony. What is your name ? Virginie Lotistatot. rSfli age 1 Twenty five. [Exclamations of incredu lity from the audience.] The lady's evidence being taken, she regained her place, still co quettishly bridling, and the next witness was introduced. This one was a full-grown young man. Your name ? said the Judge. Isadore Loustatot. Your age ?—Twenty seven years. Are you a relative ot the last witness ? I am her son. Thunder ! murmured the Magistrate , your mother must have married very young. little niggers were playing in a cornfield when one of them exclaimed "Lordee! Pete, I sees a whoppin' bi<r toad !" r "VVhar 'um V ? Sam, I can't see 'im." "Why than—right thar ! What am yer eyes, nigger ?" "Den hit 'im wid de hoe." Sam whaled away and brought Pete all up standing on one leg. "IV hy, you dratted fool nigger, dat was my foot, and I seed 'ma all de time." LT7 Mouths—an instrument to some people ot rendering ideas audible, and to others of ren dering victuals invisible. OS 3 "A \ankee says that prejudices against color are very natural, and yet .the prettiest girl he ever knew was Olive Brown. fr"When you negotiate for a house having ie modern improvement?, you will gener ally find that a mortgage is on one of them. fTF"'Among all n.y boys," said an old man, "I never had but one boy who took after me, and that was my son, Aaron, who took after me with a club." earth is a tender and kind mother to the husbandman , yet, at one season, he al ways harrows her bosom, and at another plucks her ears. 05r"Many a man thinks it is virtue r that keeps him trom turning a rascal, when it is on ly a full stomach. Oue should be careful and not mistake potatoes for principles. they say, have power to charm. Eve probably learned the art in her lamous in terview with the serpent in the garden, arid taught it to her daughters, and so womankind are charming. Hr~J rrold was enjoying a drive one day with a jovial spendthrift. "Well, Jerrold 83id the driver of a very fine pair of gravs. "what do you think of my gravs T "To tell you the truth," said Jerrold, "T was just thinking of your duns !" bed-bugs—tie them ly the fund legs and then make months at theni until yon get them into convulsions, after which crawl a round on their blind side ami stone the-m to death. (CP" A lady, at her marriage, requested the clergyman to give out to be sung by the choir, the hymn commencing : This is the way t long have sousht, And mourned because 1 found it not. VOL. 4. NO. 30.