Newspaper of The Washington Standard, December 8, 1866, Page 1

Newspaper of The Washington Standard dated December 8, 1866 Page 1
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Uashiunlon standard. j/, > i& vchbmi •' m M fß> *» p * «• » m • -« y • f»» * —— * -*• --w * * «M •*, %» tW «-4 .• > m •• \ \ fji, .* . !. 4 %. ♦•* f.T JW , I | _ -. . W* • . mi! - , o a A 'lti)'i.\ 'I l-~- I»•■«•-!:• fun i-l.< - tl.e w "g ""ghial theo rv of billiard i'ik'H : " I 11«•>"• 1 hard fv t- li you the gallic of billiards ("•ii»i-t «»t"|»inn*liiitir iv.ify balls upon u liiir table covered with green doth, that looks like halt'an aire of incd o.v laud, with an india rubber fence around it ; that the balls are pushed with Ions; wooden ramrods, with wax on 11 jo end to save the wood, and leather put on to save the wax, and chalk |>nt on to save the leather from wearing out." Having thus described the cue, he thus proceeds to furnish the ambitious student of the scientific game with a "cue" to it.i invstcrics: " on take your ram rod and rub some chalk on the little cud; then you lean over the table; then you squint; anil you lilt up vour leg ; then you fiddle a little ou your left hand with your ramrod ; it your ball runs against the other man's ball, you've done a big thing, and you poke tip a lot of buttons that are strung oil a wire. This is all there is of the game of billiards. Any one can punch billiards." " Otto von Kouigsmark (un cle of the Koiiigstnark who shot Tom Thynne, of Longleat,) appear od iis an ambassador at the court of Louis XIV., niid had to make a Swedish speech at his reception lie fore the most Christian King. Otto was a famous dandy and warrior, hut ho forgot the speech, and what do you think lie did? Far from be ing disconcerted, lie recited a portion of the Swedish Cathechism to his most Christian Majesty and his court not one of whom understood his lin go, with the exception of his own suite, who had to keep their gravity as best they might. jgigjy— The newspapers have great ly contributed to enrich the English language. We shall shortly have, thanksto the gent emeu of the press, a pretty, delicate, idiomatic turn of speech for all the principal affairs of life. Thus, a widow is " a fair rel ict;" a young woman making her debut at a police office, is "an inter esting female." Formerly a crimin al used to be hanged, but now he is " launched into eternity." A man was sometimes drowned in olden times, but it oftener occurs that ho is " immersed in the liquid ele ment till life was extinguished." A lady lately asked a gen tleman the meaning of the word sur rogate. and the gentleman explained it to her a* *• a pate through which partie* have to jjet ni.trrie»i. " - Tiwn I ituatrine. *aid the la dy. -that it i« a corruption of aor r>w rite. • ar rtjgii. u.ia , " rtrf 'teJ Ker n vxnao »■» u tbrnit tiM «4 var I" mh A* I r*u •*■*>«. »- W mm * \*mr* tftr tun*. w a It* *■ fl»« MM lAbMhk.. tf *• w X -** W gv 1 I «« «4F W~ TW »* ■ «—< «f mmrnr »* 4M* rw- *»« « •*«■» ■ mi- - » frntm H s* B-rsn * Ai ptrsr 4- 3 -*ms . r dhrtt * *:: * *2l at I jmr >jt «*rz \m m f iH kwmm irrmn Tw fr » -* I4n W <w TW* fc in—l» v «riv W"■ Miri «4 M 4 au» a f*"* »■» «4 #; jr. Inv< t« ■ ifTM. UkT»« —<* • t n rty ton J »»* w Art » -r «"<•&, .» •- " M : ' * * '* *" -• tlw'f* Lad L* "• Hkkmt f* ! i t»» ~U t * ii M•tc «" - -i 7 ".'. » . *<■, |*! ► . ». VI I ,*'l' •• I • -a-rrr-. ■' Wl ii rim- i - IViU tali Ji• j • I Pfci : rif. I «n«*re!y ».*. I *ooU U d<- 'i Jli AapwaUr, Im{W d Kan* v ; "but it 1 thought He - i >u!d «vt*r«> . .lid luve dl-th gh- t«»- ward ea> h other. I -hotild !«■ tempted to terminate tny existeiat*!" " My previous Famiy !" cried I'hil, springing up and up-etting the t'»ast plate on the carpet, of which he was entirely oblivious in his eagerness to get his arms around Kami v. "My loo'ish little darling ! as it we would ever be so absurd! (a kiss.) May I lie drawn and quartered (am ther kiss) if over 1 speak oiu word that shall cause a tear to till the divine eyes of my dearest (a third explosion) Fan n v. 44 (Mi, how liappv yon ninkc mo, Phil! 1 shall try so hard to bo just tlic faithful, loving wife you deserve. Xow finish your breakfast, deary. Tlio toast will bo growing cold. And Oh! Phil, did you notice Mrs. Smith's horrid new bonnet last night ? I declare it destroyed all mv pleasure in the music! Ido wish people who will wear such untastful bonnet would stay at home from those delightful concerts!" 44 So do I, Fanny. 1 noticed the u»ly thing the moment we entered the hall. Blue flowers and pink rib buns, and she dark as a creole." 44 No, my love, the flowers wore green—green and blue look so much alike by gas-light." 44 1 know they do ; but I noticed it so particular that I could not be de ceived. IJlue especially light blue—looks fearfully on a dark-com plexioned person." 44 So it does, Phill, I quite agree with you, dear, lint the flowers were not blue, they were green. I saw them at Airs. Gray's shop before they were purchased." "My dearest Fanny, of course you think you are right, my love; but I have a very good eye for color, and I noticed these flowers with groat attention. Blue anemones with yellow centres." "Green hibusens with white cen tres, my dear Phil. Vory pretty for a light-skinned woman, but horrid for a brunette.• " Why, Fann, how absurd! As if I could not determine a color when I studied it half the evening. " "But it was by gaslight my love. It would look altogother different by daylight. It was such a pale blue. I remember I thought of the sky be fore a storm." " And I thought of the sea. It was nearly a sea green." "Why. Fanny, ridiculous! It was sky hi ue." " How you do contradict me, mv dear Philemon. It was a very light green." " And I inai«t it wa- blue." "Do you in.-an to tell u»e I lie? " *• I mean totdl vou vou are tllirtl." Üb> uut' to the »*iut tking ~ \ ot tuakt tW «. V|n Dan Mr iW« JU . - Tmmi ' I mm ff mm J""""* • r ~ % ■"J I«" II tw <ar. £ « a ** » V* a ■ —fWl a m 1 111 I mm* Skit* flMfr *4 •* * mm*-, mmmm * flfc* ■mm «r "" » e*mt WF jn/t an*" 'o, *• m»- ■ mmm ir- Wm rnnrn'm in l * wHf i »■% TiutiT c\ % *n iti* *1 v, ihe® eiieLl \ mm * ar I*~ * » w • « MMk. Mi MMk •"»* «• »' a • •a* c anMt ***■«. m**» — , s-T T* - *i **■' t>-» -<•* «*rA» ' F*«•«, «im-f *• c I * **s» T ' ■ l j - ' j 'i r . \ tn tt.r • «,, t .f • I C . L .'i.r to pj thai I nil!. V.«a m<» -f. r . >• t. 111 U d.».«r- ••! ffi'iii n ?|.<« r\ «Li\. ft* ! ai.d !..• j luttt-r in ■ !■• • idWMJ ;it:> r lb* R bSm. Jml .»t that moment I'hii - l"n> 'c Joltn. a shrewd old I. !!•>>*. appearctl on the -erne, lie surviyrd the group witli an anxifii-. twinkle of the eye. ••What's the matter, Kannv? A n\thing gone wrong:' hcenuuifed ed.' ••(tone wrong! matter enough ! (>l., I iicle John, he's a wretch, and he set out to strike me with a poker !" '• And she threw a plate ot mutlius and the platter of ham at me." "lie's a monster, Fncle John. I'll bo divorced from liiiu this very «l;iy. He's worse than a savage." "So he is,' tried Fucle John, en tering warmly into the spirit of the thing. "So he is," —stripping off eort —"and I'll settle the matter at onec. You stand back, Fanny; I'll give him such a thrashing as he'll ho likely to remember. Striking his wife with a poker, it.deed ! l'il rectify matters, and Uncle John grasped the long handled feather dus ter and flourished it threateningly around the head of his nephew. " There, sir, take that, and that, and that!" exclained li3'bringing down fhe feathers on the shoulders of the amazing I'hil. " Fanny, my dear, I'll not leave a bone of him whole." Fanny's round blue eyes had been growing larger and larger, and now her indignation hurst. "John Hays," screamed she, " you're a heathen and an old med dling vagabond. TA-t Phil alone, lie's my dear, dear husband, and yon have no business to touch him. He's an angel, lie never intended to strike me. lie still striking him, or you'll he sorry," and Fanny seized the broom from behind the door and prepared to do battle. "Stand back !" cried Uncle John, "he's a monster, and deserves death. The man that would threaten to strike a woman ought to be hung!" Fanny's eyes blazed—slie (lew at Uncle John with the spite ofa ti gress, and the way the trio went around the room was worth witness ing. Uncle John after l'hil with the duster, and Fanny after Uncle John with the broom. • Phil made a spring for the window, but there WAS a whatnot in the way, getting his leg entangled in that, he brought the whole concern to the floor, ainbrotypes, books, vases, rare china, and a hundred cherished curi osities, all were involved in l ruin. l'hil went down with the other things, Uncle John stumbled over him, and Fanny saved hcrselfhv seiz ing the In-11-cord, which brought her two servants sjhh'ilily on the spot. Of iimr»» they t«*>k Phil and un cle it t li 'D* liffaker, and if Fannv • explanation bad irnt Im enforced l»\ •mi'lrr "f l.'T the nit.'njttfiH'i• ai jlit Lave W«.n TW ir*t n<nK«t 4 «»lm w «r i *d BJ-« W nwpV rat ■» - mm*. - M* p • «« mh4 •fc« f Ummi • ■>*■».»« «# -%»«■»•■»• 'jfc, rw %a 4 t •vkr 1 ka# fltar In w»n» tMT -«■«. itMM t' •"••» MM» im 4WM *» ■P 1 " ■ «f « —Jfcan* pklw

i- J MMM***** "MWBMb'- iORk •t' ' m m»f\ I m- t % I M iWK VH Jl VMI P . «'# Aaki 4m **■ Ik -s» % t* •»* - mMm »w> I t* { $ It i-m* » JSNfc A tk - -iMPe I jygl «r a f 4: wv t3har : 'iM* Z~ ■+* * « . A ißr^nrv. % < i » L.i «W"U' tir U ; « i f . »• < * Vlv • u. «» « • f'• .a I«'i' Hi 1 * «••>" K» i»_» W, n itt l *k btlf'-n Ift ua n'f. - vn.:..r I i L« r • - is •• a t:v«* a«kW'»r --• I w - . ! at t i p -rt Uiy tail of luv ! -r f >. when »bv »«.-d: "I'hil'v i-he a!\\tii« kalied Uie I'liillv . -I'iiiiiy, dccr,wby»t rot pur clii< me sum music : *• Lite of my hart." se«| ], " thy behests -hall be «d«eved." *• Kali me pet naims," said the ten der-haited sarytiui, and imuicgiately swooned with «!«•!ite. That ni'e as I took my departure from the bootlul C'tlestia's I scd to myself, " I'ndoubtedly she luvs me. <), heavenly thought! Ken I be awaik which was not very likely, seeing as 1 had my pocket pickt by an audashus fejlow who hail taiken advantage of my abstraction. When I neckstaddressed ('elcstia,- tivas with a luv letter, which Ijn* ditud after grate efforts, with the aid of my stoopendiH jenus and an old song book. The missive red as foU locs, tn wit: "DHEKEST CEI.ESTIA: —Faro wun of of the Golden Locks, ever of thee I'm fondly decerning. Thy brite smile haunts me still. Adorable wun, thou art the only woman I ever hived. Helmed Girl, thou art so near and yet so far. ltock me to sleep Iteautiful dreemer. I'd oll'sr thee this hand of mine. Wilt tlion acksept, from your troo luv, This I seeled, and sent to my af finity, ami reseaved the following anser. It red thuslv : " 1 )I:I:H I'. IK: Sportive boy, every thing is selnhrius. O. kum kum ! Am lor am I not. Kxkusc my in kohereney. The thought will drive me mad. CKLKSTIA." Upon reeding of which I inimeg iately and swooned in my footsteps. 44 Twas envening when I again started forth to visit the dommysil of thcsaluhrius widdoe, and the stars seemed to shine in mello lite upon my kare-worn linnyments as ifthev new that I was sun to jine my faith with wim too angelick for a length ened residence upon this sinful sfere; and while my hart beet with over powering emoshuns, I asked myself in mumuring acksents if I wus wur thy of this earthly shcrrybim, and arriving at her dore at the instant I asked this question, I was ushered in before I had time to answer it. \vi ien 1 stood in the presens of the happi gurl, she scd : " Philly, deer, do I again behold thy franc and open kount enance?" " O Celestia! prev do not gaze upon me in that refulgent stile—do not: my hart will bust?" said I. "And now tell tuc when thou wilt 1H» niv hrvde J" And I k! e*'li»«l I»efore lier to the <«f tor l*-*t |>HIN. *■ Tin lintie mi J Oleitit d»»- tiaintuflr. - Ar. •weft- van **' I thrv*- ii j: Ui\ mrm* *r xin<l b«-r ~ bn *i!l mr br nurrvj *" B«t n*r bit trikM tW Wd wrtfc a k-» «*.»*«■«. |M I! W- * t-»* ~ I*w*» * t•« r !■ 11 I* m mr; ■br * wri I ' M*"» *-•««■ * »W mnL • ••• - ®«r mm 4L ' BWb * I «•» *«• & M HlDi -4m irgp * W" MP*% 4BM* % -*<o* ttr A Mdn 'IBINMMHk 44M,. ~41 * «!■«■ 'iMw* awowr I'll ILLY Dttoxi:." *«■ ito 1 "! w"« a #h» • M H—l. mm —paMfeprl pr-, .«n tar f ii »* W0 MS TW m. W 4m & Mww| k» tW«r »■ m t*m mm igi «l tM mmv tni <4 tWtf i»4I i T—if li a « f»-r- tat.. • biM »ii»J i»W «? wt • i l l M»ir «4 » "Tl* m— ■ M l*ft fMjutwn • »*r tnf h <4 r» li.« irr iitia. L « • !•» cautravwd. »a»iiff *4 l.f • rjrrf i t 4»-d. h • Jrm. t »;ar»*«. k • f rt itw. if b* Ush on# 1 , var t tM tif t ' 1 ■»» arc a!! tu*Jf tl»r dinniMrton. A ian of BatlOiii *iu on Lis cas« da:U. until everything a«vcrtaiuab!e e mceniit.p Itini La* Uwn ascertained, and if inquiry is laflrJ, and no Ar i;:diue can find the clue to his past, crncsswork. in due time, takes the place of tacts, and he is " reckoned up," as inspector liucket would say, on a fancy basis. A previous histo ry he must have, and, in the absence of any authentic record, he is fur nished with one by the tongue of go?sip. ]»ut in a hustling city, you can settle down anywhere without at tracting the slightest attention. You care for nobody, and nobody cares for you, as the song says. The family in the adjoining house docs not publish your name on a door-plate, and your servants are not on visiting terms with the kitch en circle next door, you may remain twelve month as utterly unknown to the beings whose laughter you hear through the paity wall, as if you dwelt in Central Africa. Peo ple talk of seeking retirement in the country. The idea is ridiculous. If you waut to be isolated from the world, live quietly in the midst of a densely populated and busy dif tr'.ct. CONTENTMENT. —Thorc are thou sands so extravagant in tlieir ideas of contentment, as to imagine that it must consist in having everything in the world turn out the way they wish—that they arc to sit down in happiness, and feel themselves so at case on every point, as to desire nothing bettor and nothing more. I own there are instances of some, who seem to pass through the world as if all their paths had been strewn with rosebuds of delight; but a littlo experience will convince us. 'tis a fatal expectation to go upon. We arc born to trouble, and we may depend upon it whilst we live in this world we shall have it, though with intermissions —that is. in what ever state wo are, wo shall find a mixture of good and evil, and, there fore, the true way to contentment is to know how to receive these certain vicissitudes of life—the returns of good and evil; so as neither to bo exalted by the one, nor overthrown by the other, but to bear ourselves toward everything that happens with such easo and indift'erenee of mind an to hazard as little as may be. This is the true temperate climate fitted for us by nature, and in which every wise man would wish to live. HIDDEN MUSIC. —Those who have visited the mouth of the river, on the southeru coast of Mis sissippi, may have heard the hidden music for which ttie spot is noted On still summer evening* one may hear from the shore, or still belter trv»m a boat floating upou the river, a low. plaiative «»>und proceeding t'r»»ca tlif waier. and rt*ing and tsii ing Ekt tke «traii»« o* a* .Cohan V»Q. TV* •.NB.K are u*k»cnbnMir »««*? aad n*d rtme ■ a# tW** m amv « da»- TTlan - «<U» aranef TW pkew -v to Uto to* Im tfcr Mtototdk m, t m, * t»MI itoMtototo «MN*i»» tow**** m ft &mm*v -««tototo^ ,; «MC& to*** * Mm aMMMto. *OO %«a <*■» *■■■*» ■ 3P "**■»* 11*L£ V* 317. Mft MM Maaat. a a* mmom fr«M. A» ra»ad MHm a iai k« * MB a( *far-r 4*• I nfhai fcr bml anTb tkt IrmiOvl i-mmmr ut prati mi » a»«i ey**r*,tc frrm Tkas 'l* Liftor »Wt| abor* tfce of tb« r*rrk tUe Lctftfeier tt lit* ktaMptw. M Liic M a ctuerm) ralr it i*-better to to ijivtiu-DU laving t win dow atij the fireplace open ia all &ca»oii#, jet whertr miasm abounds, erincinr it* presence by cbillt and fever, fever and ague, diarrhoea, and the like, it i» better to sleep with closed wiudows, because men are known to fatteu in jails and small prison cells, while the breathing of malaria a single night has originat ed diseases which, trom the violence of their action, are scarcely distin guishable from the effects of swat* lowing corrosive sublimate. But although the air inside of A house is supplied from the the out side, yet if the windows and ontside doors are closed, it is supplied in such small quantities that it is at once heated by the indoor air, and carried to the ceiling, where it is above reach. I AN IMPRESSION. —Some yenrs ago a couple of temperauce lecturers had I been holding forth in one of our country towns. Business detaining them rather late after the meetings i they weut to a tavern to stay for the j night, rather than disturb the family \ where they had been entertained ! during their stay. Now it was a ! rum tavern where they sought lodg | ings, and they resolved to get up be* j times in the morning, and pay theii* t bill, and leave before the folks were generally stirring. Early morning found them at the bar paying up, but not alone. A thirsty customer, whom the spirits had rapped up ear ly was in the act of taking his/' bit ■tors" as they entered—holding the tumbler in one hand and the decant in the other, he paused on observing them, when all at once he hiccough ed out —for he was full of the old drunk —" 110 d'ye do (hie) gentleman. Glad (hie) to see ye. Heard ye talk (hie) last night. Here he lifted his glass, and with a " good he'l gen'tle men," drank it off. After smacking his lips and wiping his mouth WitE the cuff of his coat, he again address ed our friends. " When r've goin* to lecture ajrin(hic) gen'lemen ? want to go ou'nhearye; had some t-tall talk in' last night, no mistake; made konsi'rabl p-pression on me (hie) — been dry ever since." Oar friends caved. PORT WINE. —Port wine i* pro duced i a the vicinity of Oporto, on the Douro, in Portugal. The prin cipal vineyards are in the mountain* ous districts, about fifteen league* from the city. There the vines are not suffered to grow higher than three and a half feet. The viutqga begins in September, and lasts about a mouth. The juiee having been expressed from the grapes by the treading process, is placed in casks to fetmrot, then transferred to large rata, where a Mcoaii fcfiaiststiss •MseL la the winter it is nm into pi pa* asJ seat to Oaorta- \a ao«e *■»? t Tnlpru t9ta«r|» * 1 II '■* •